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Hiện kết quả 1 đến 4 trong tổng số 4

Đề tài: Ai đó chấm điểm e bài này với, nếu chấm theo SAT th́ càng tốt :)

  1. #1
    Tham gia ngày
    Nov 2010
    Bài gửi
    9
    Cám ơn
    19
    Được cám ơn 2 lần trong 1 bài viết

    Mặc định Ai đó chấm điểm e bài này với, nếu chấm theo SAT th́ càng tốt :)

    Assignment: Are even our best plans always at the mercy of unexpected, chance events? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this idea. Support your position with reasoning and examples from your reading studies experience or observation.

    MY ESSAY
    We have been familiar with planned plans for a long time since the very first day of human’s society. As the randomness of life, almost every time, some thing unexpected did occur on that project. As demonstrated by several evidence, the importance appears not to lie on the way we do but on how we react to the newly arose problems.
    In the last leaf by O'Henry, at first, every reader certainly thought that it was Johnsy who would be the first one to die due to her pessimistic thoughts during the illness. In fact, she believed that her life depended on the number of navy leaves on the brick wall opposite her bedroom’s window. In the end, after the death of Berhmen – the old artist who had devoted to entire tire rainy night without a raincoat to maintaining the last leaf on that wall, the girl changed her life attitude and survived marvelously. These things, therefore, demonstrated that life is full of unexpected events which can wholly change everything around us, it is the way we live, the way we think and the way we adapt that make our life better.
    When taking the entrance test to a nationally well-known specialized high school in the capital, I was extremely surprise to realize that the exam paper contain some literature article that I had never thought it would be chosen before. Finally, I ended up my exam badly as I had not been well prepared. After that unexpected failure, I decided to concentrate more on my study and seriously work on every unit of the course book. One month later, I passed the entrance exam to the provincial high school for the gifted as one among the students with highest score. Sometimes, sudden things’ happening can be not completely bad. Perhaps, these things bring about a new mind, new way of thinking as to more efficiently solve the problems.
    All thing considered, everyday, there are several things unexpectedly happens around us. It is how we choose to face up with them, whether we are adaptive or not that make them become worse or better.

    Lich khai giang TOEIC Academy


  2. #2
    Tham gia ngày
    Nov 2012
    Nơi cư ngụ
    Ho Chi Minh City
    Bài gửi
    0
    Cám ơn
    0
    Được cám ơn 0 lần

    Mặc định

    Trích Nguyên văn bởi thinhnguyenduc Xem bài viết
    Assignment: Are even our best plans always at the mercy of unexpected, chance events? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this idea. Support your position with reasoning and examples from your reading studies experience or observation.

    MY ESSAY
    We have been familiar with planned plans for a long time since the very first day of human’s society. As the randomness of life, almost every time, some thing unexpected did occur on that project. As demonstrated by several evidence, the importance appears not to lie on the way we do but on how we react to the newly arose problems.
    In the last leaf by O'Henry, at first, every reader certainly thought that it was Johnsy who would be the first one to die due to her pessimistic thoughts during the illness. In fact, she believed that her life depended on the number of navy leaves on the brick wall opposite her bedroom’s window. In the end, after the death of Berhmen – the old artist who had devoted to entire tire rainy night without a raincoat to maintaining the last leaf on that wall, the girl changed her life attitude and survived marvelously. These things, therefore, demonstrated that life is full of unexpected events which can wholly change everything around us, it is the way we live, the way we think and the way we adapt that make our life better.
    When taking the entrance test to a nationally well-known specialized high school in the capital, I was extremely surprise to realize that the exam paper contain some literature article that I had never thought it would be chosen before. Finally, I ended up my exam badly as I had not been well prepared. After that unexpected failure, I decided to concentrate more on my study and seriously work on every unit of the course book. One month later, I passed the entrance exam to the provincial high school for the gifted as one among the students with highest score. Sometimes, sudden things’ happening can be not completely bad. Perhaps, these things bring about a new mind, new way of thinking as to more efficiently solve the problems.
    All thing considered, everyday, there are several things unexpectedly happens around us. It is how we choose to face up with them, whether we are adaptive or not that make them become worse or better.

    Ḿnh góp ư được hem bạn ^^!
    Tại ḿnh đang học Academic Writing..Như ḿnh thấy th́ bài essay bạn làm như là kể chuyện thui hà! Mí cái đoạn nó hok có topic sentence. tại 1 paragraph ḿnh cần có topic sentence và at least là 2 supporting idea cho cái controling idea của câu topic. hok bik là topic này được viết theo dạng nào. Nhưng ḿnh nghĩ là Argumentative essay.
    Bạn có ư..nhưng nó chỉ đứng trên quan điểm 1 mặt hà..bạn fai suy nghĩ general hơn..Ḿnh thấy bạn có vốn từ rộng (ḿnh nghèo vốn từ lắm) nhưng bạn chưa bik cách brainstorm và cái order của 1 bài essay.
    Ḿnh chỉ đưa ra ư kiến vậy thui hà....tại ḿnh cũm đi lên từ việc ko bik viết và ḿnh bik nó khó như thế nào..Chúc bạn thành công ^^!

    Học từ vựng


  3. #3
    Tham gia ngày
    Oct 2012
    Bài gửi
    10
    Cám ơn
    1
    Được cám ơn 4 lần

    Mặc định

    I think your essay is still not well academically organized. The body part too long and not clearly separated. You should construct body part in two absolute paragraphs: one about the story and one about your experience.
    Secondly, the words and structures you utilized frequently are not recommended in academic writing. You have a good resource of vocabulary and you should exploit it more effectively.
    Anw, you have a good writing skill that I must be envious of. you should practice more to maintain and develop it

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  4. #4
    Tham gia ngày
    Oct 2012
    Bài gửi
    10
    Cám ơn
    1
    Được cám ơn 4 lần

    Mặc định

    We have been familiar with planned plans for a long time since the very first day of human’s society. As the randomness of life, almost every time, some thing unexpected did occur on that project. As demonstrated by several evidence, the importance appears not to lie on the way we do but on how we react to the newly arose problems.
    In the last leaf by O'Henry, at first, every reader certainly thought that it was Johnsy who would be the first one to die due to her pessimistic thoughts during the illness. In fact, she believed that her life depended on the number of navy leaves on the brick wall opposite her bedroom’s window. In the end, after the death of Berhmen – the old artist who had devoted to entire tire rainy night without a raincoat to maintaining the last leaf on that wall, the girl had changed her life attitude and survived marvelously. These things, therefore, demonstrated that life is full of unexpected events which can wholly change everything around us, it is the way we live, the way we think and the way we adapt that make our life better.
    When taking the entrance test to a nationally well-known specialized high school in the capital, I was extremely surprise to realize that the exam paper contain some literature article that I had never thought it would be chosen before.

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